Women in Halacha

Hello all. I set up this blog some time ago, but maintaining a blog is time consuming. So I never bothered posting here. But I recently wrote some comments on XGH which I which to preserve, so here goes.

The discussion was about women in Halacha, if women are inferior etc. I had asked how come there wasn't ever a woman president. Anonymous responded - What on earth does this have to do with women's ability to testify and initiate divorce in halachah? To which I responded - Because woman are different than men, no matter how much they scream otherwise.

Arora then asked - What exactly do *you* think those differences are, and how exactly do *you* think those differences imply a women's inability to testify and initiate divorce in halacha.

My response: (slightly edited)

Arora, you asked for it. Every rule has exceptions, including this one.

That said, let's start with the Gemara that notes that by "respect", the father is mentioned first - "Honor your father and your mother", and by "fear", the mother is mentioned first - "A man shall fear his mother and father". The Gemara explains, that a mother speaks softly to her child, thus the child is less fearsome of her. Therefore the Torah mentions by "fear" first the mother. The opposite by "respect". Since the child fears more the father, the Torah neccesated to write the father before the mother by the commandmant of "respect".

We also find in beginning of Exodus that Pharoah called for "Pu'ah". Why "Pu'ah"? for she (Miriam) spoke softly with the babies and carressed them. Further not by choice but by nature, it is the woman that developes the 9 month relationship with the fetus, and it is she who bonds with her infant via providing its nourishment (nursing).

Thus, nature provides women with these 3 characteristics. She carries the fetus, she sustains her infant, and she was given the gentle personality to coo the baby when it's upset.

For a trait to exist and prosper, it must coexist with a contradictory trait. God initially created the world with "Din" - judgement. When it was apparent that the world would not withstand "Din" alone, God didn't subsitute it with "Rachmim", but rather added it to "Din". The two opposite characteristics counterbalance each other and only then can we have a just world.

God created man on the sixth day, the last of creation. V'kivshua - I made you a perfect complete world. Go conquer it. To conquer, one must be fearsome and strong minded = the male. God knew that one sided characteristics can't survive. So God created mans opposite - his Ezer K'NEGDO. The woman would be gentle, not fearsome. While the man would conquer others, the woman would allow others to conquer her (V'hu Yimshol Buch). While the man would sustain himself from exterior sources, the woman would sustain others from her interior sources.

A child is the continuation of our existance. Thus, a child can only be created via both opposing characteristics - the cohabition of the father AND the mother. The child can only become one type or the other (male or female). However, when he comes to the stage where he wishes to ensure his continuity, he must interact with a member of his opposite characteristic. Only by the interaction of the two opposites can they further reproduce (which is why the Torah opposes Gays and Lesbians. The purpose and goal of Judaism is the steady transmission and continuity of its traditions, which as explained, can only exist when there is a contrast of traits).

In the same vein, "just like no two faces are alike, no two minds are alike". If we all thought alike, there would be no challenge, no room for growth.

An oldest child doesn't have a challenge, if it doesn't have a sibling undeneath it. God chose us as his oldest child, for we were the first to recognise his sovereignity. But as mentioned, to grow and prosper as an oldest child, we need to have in place the challenge put forth by the younger siblings. **Remember**, the younger siblings ALWAYS outnumber the oldest one. That doesn't demean his specialness, but to the contrary, the more siblings underneath it, the greater responsibility and greater growth it creates for the oldest.

As the Torah declares, its purpose is "L'sitcha Elyon Al Kol Hagoyim". Torah is the vehicle to which we can strive as the nation which - Ohr Lagoyim - lightens up the nations of the world.

Torah is therefore our core existance. It is what enables us, a mere speck of the human population, to continously survive against all odds. And bottom line, it has. 3,300 years later, while the greatest kingdoms have become nothing more than pages in a history book, us jews are here today as alive as ever. In any other religion, the killing of 6 million of its followers (half the nation? 2/3rds?) would have more or less ensured its end. Yet, not only we have survived, Torah is expanding by the leaps and bounds. As explained above, in the same way that in order for the world to maintain its continuity, it had to be built of opposing characteristics, so to, for the Torah to retain its survival, it too has to have its opposing traits. A "one Torah for all" would never survive. There would be no challenge, no incentive for growth.

Torah can only survive with contrast. The are many commoncies - the Lo Saaseh's etc. The woman also has two arms and two legs. But she has physical difference too. The Torah divides via the Mitzvos Aseh - the mitzvos which are time bound. The woman by nature cannot always make herself available. She shares herself with a fetus. When the infant is hungry, its the mother that must avail herself. So according to the natural existant differences between man and woman, the Torah set different presets and paths, for both parties to reach the ultimate goal - the continuity of our tradition, and that the nation of Israel shall serve as a guiding light to the world. This cannot be accomplished by the man himself, neither by the woman herself. This can only be done by each side inputting that of which the other side lacks. If the man is inputting the learning of Torah, the woman balances that out via her input of chesed/kindness. If the man has the role of judge and witness - the basis of the upkeep of society, which requires a tougher stance - "Din", the woman balances out society via her natural instinct of "Rachmim", which as I noted above, one can't survive without the other.

It would take forever to hammer out every little detail why the man is commanded such and such vs the woman. But I do hope I have laid before you the basic foundation to it.

In conclusion, men and women have differing roles in Halacha, where one without the other couldn't survive. It has nothing to do with women being inferior. Its about a system designed for the long term survival of our glorious heritage.

And 3,330 years later, our Torah values are still alive, standing tall and proud.